He wakes up fresh and glowy and you look like this.9.He uses words like "dope." Actually, this is sort of cute.10. Every time you're walking, he grabs your hand and sprints to cross at the street the next light before it turns red.
He does not yet entirely comprehend that the world is a bullshittery. Theory: People start enjoying morning sex only when they get to the age where the morning is the only time they're not stressed out or exhausted, therefore the ~*~*s Ex Ie St~*~*. Which then leads to him poking his boner into your back at moments when you are least interested. He's trying some new passion project every week and you have to be supportive of every single one. I know he has the energy of a crackhead on a log flume, but nightlife is for youngs.2. at ironic dive bars and/or feels awesome going to parties where he only know three people.Like "playing the triangle in a Mississippi-by-way-of-Brooklyn jug band," or "Kickstarting a docudrama series he plans to direct, produce, write and star in" or "enjoying a long and fulfilling career that is also his passion and will never require him to do anything he doesn't want to do." Oh, dear.3. You have conversations with female acquaintences whose husbands are lawyers or doctors or entrepreneurs who are like "So what does he do? Hahahhaha do you know where the ladies' room is, great, thanks."5. And you wind up not being able to take that trip to Puerto Vallarta because he racked up way too many bar tabs last month.6.His lack of direction inevitably leads you to start sounding like his parents — sometimes at inappropriate moments, like when your top is off. He still wants to have intellectual discussions with you over dinner because he misses the ones he had in college.
Sorry, I want to smash my face directly into my fresh rosemary pasta without discussing the recurring motifs of Francis Ford Coppola films. He can eat whatever and expects you to also be able to eat whatever.
Like when you're walking home drunk and he's like "Hey, we should eat something, lets stop at this place that's famous for their sour-cream-and-chili-covered hot dogs wrapped in bacon!!
" And you're like, how do you not realize my stomach is a shitty used car that'll break as soon as you drive it out of the lot?? He can drink until he passes out and barely feel it the next day, because #youth.
In a few years, he'll be just as cynical as you are, but right now his idealism is half-adorable, half-irritating.13. It doesn't turn you on so much as make your subconscious add a trombone into your dream.16.
You have to teach him how to correctly do adult stuff/run mildly challenging errands/wash things until they are actually clean. His endurance is awesome, but his skill may not always match. He grew up with a high-speed smorgasbord of any porn he wants.
Once you are used to on-demand naked ladies always ready to go, you're...